And did you get what
you wanted from this life, even so?
And what did you want?
To call myself beloved, to feel myself
beloved on the earth.
~ Raymond Carver (Late Fragment)
An increasing number of studies point to what we know: the quality of our relationships matter when it comes to happiness. I often tell young people that whom they marry limits or expands their potential for happiness. Aside from the relationship that you have with yourself, your relationship with your spouse is the most influential relationship you will ever have.
Moreover, satisfying marriages do not come easy. Statistics indicate that half of the marriages end in divorce. When I hear those statistics, I can’t help but picture a coin toss. Heads it works, tails we fail.
At MiraNous we help couples in any state in their marriage as long as both parties are open to and willing to do the work to improve the marriage. Please understand that the sessions are not meant to be complaining sessions. These sessions are not designed to make a case about why your spouse is the culprit of all that is wrong. These sessions are no the place to bring forth a litany of problems from the past and assign blame. The expectation in coaching is that you are ready to peek into the past to garner understanding as you reflect on past perceptions, attitudes, behaviors, actions, and choices. The goal is that you will use that understanding to move forward.
The End Goal
Dr. Esther Perel says that most of us will have three significant relationships in our lifetime. Sometimes those three significant relationships are with three different people. Sometimes, those three significant relationships involve the same person. At the end of a coaching engagement with MiraNous, our goal is for the couples we work with to choose to a have a new relationship, a different relationship with the same person! Imagine what it will do for your marriage for both of you to fully and truly recommit to each other for the second time or even the third.
Challenges We Coach
Some of the challenges that we help our clients with are:
- A marriage feels unsatisfying and not united
- A marriage that has become a tertiary priority – third to children, work, and everything else
- A marriage that is strained by “responsibility reversal” for example the wife is the primary breadwinner or sole breadwinner
- The husband feels a lack of respect; The wife feelings of lack of love
- Overcoming something that occurred in the past that is blocking progress, blocking happiness
- Affairs and limerence
Difference between Marriage Coaching and Marriage Counseling
Marriage coaching is the modality that serves individuals who have a willingness to develop self-awareness, to practice self-mastery, and who desire to actualize their marriage. If there is a need for healing, if an individual has confusing psychological issues, or if an individual seems stuck and incapable of moving forward from something in his or her past, then marriage counseling is a better avenue.
At this time, we only work with a few couples at a time. The program we design for you will be based on your specific needs and goals. Some of the things that we offer clients are:
- Combination of individual and couple coaching, so you are growing as individuals and as a couple
- Mediation to develop a marriage development plan and finally get traction on the problem that has a grip on the marriage
- We take a data-based approach through a process that allows us to use qualitative analysis to help the couples understand what is happening in their marriage
- Services offered in Spanish
Please click and schedule an inquiry session. There is no obligation after the call. We aim to provide value even with this free inquiry call. Then you can decide if we are your next best step in creating the marriage you were meant to have.